Of Parenting

When you were young and accidently broke your mother’s favorite vase, did you simply collapse with fear? When your father used to come home, did you with the rest of your siblings scatter away turning out T.V, DVD Player as you flew the coop? Did you have to think a gazillion times before you could go up to your parents and say,” I made a boo-boo and I am sorry”?

If my long term memory serves me right, corporal punishment was never an option in our house. All I remember is a blow on the back from dad while studying for mathematics’ examination (I am sure it was unintentional) and a slap or two from mom (purely intentional) for pestering her. At first I thought these were the perks of being the only kid but this punishment thing simply doesn’t run in the family.

After so many years, I wonder, would have I turned out any different if answers to these questions in the first paragraph had been in affirmative. Most probably I would have. Would it have been worth it? I don’t know. It’s all relative. The temptation and ability to blab out everything at the end of the day to my folks is something I cherish. Best present a parent could give to his/her child. Many a times I simply didn’t do something bad, because I knew I would ultimately let it all out. They would come to know and there is no hiding from them. I knew I wouldn’t get a beating but still I was and am scared. Mental warfare at its best.

Worst times have been those when intentionally or unintentionally this communication gap was temporarily bottlenecked. As soon as you find yourself not answerable to anyone, problems start brewing up. Mr. Know-it-all smarty pants ends up creating one heck of a mess. Our lives would be much simpler if these communication lines are kept live and running.

I once read in Reader’s Digest to consider your children as grown ups when they stop asking you from where they came and stop telling you where they are going. I think no matter how much we grow up we should always let them know where we are going. They may not always like it and we may not always agree but in the end it works out for the good. One could never find a better cushion to fall back on. They are your first and last line of defense. The chink less armor.